September 17, 2015

"Mr. Beauvoir was in his mid-30s and planning a career in biochemistry when his grandfather, on his deathbed, stunningly anointed him his successor as a houngan..."

"... one of the 6,000 or so healers, soothsayers, exorcists and therapists who outnumbered doctors and Roman Catholic priests in Haiti. The 17th-century mystical traditions imported by slaves from West Africa and known in Haiti as Vodou coexist there with Christianity."
“Just as a carnival band went by the house,” Mr. Beauvoir recalled in a 1983 interview with The New York Times, “grandfather turned to me and said, ‘You will carry on the tradition.’ It was not the sort of thing you could refuse.”...

“My position as supreme chief in voodoo was born out of a controversy,” he said. “Today, voodooists are at the bottom of society. They are virtually all illiterate. They are poor. They are hungry. You have people who are eating mud, and I don’t mean that as a figure of speech.”
From the obituary of Max Beauvoir, who lived to the age of 79. If you read far enough into this piece, you'll find:
In 1975 he staged a ceremony for Bill and Hillary Rodham Clinton on their honeymoon. In his memoir “My Life” (2004), Mr. Clinton recalled, “The spirits arrived, seizing a woman and a man.... The man proceeded to rub a burning torch all over his body and walk on hot coals without being burned. The woman, in a frenzy, screamed repeatedly, then grabbed a live chicken and bit its head off.

Mr. Clinton did not elaborate on whether the man and woman benefited from the ceremony, except to say, “Haitians’ understanding of how God is manifest in our lives is very different from that of most Christians, Jews or Muslims, but their documented experiences certainly prove the old adage that the Lord works in mysterious ways.”
Did you know that a chicken's head was bitten off in a Bill and Hillary Clinton honeymoon ceremony?!

31 comments:

MathMom said...

Sounds about right.

rhhardin said...

Chickens are dumber than democrats.

Joe Biden, America's Putin said...

Considering the Clinton's are demon-spawns from the bowels of hell, it fits.

Mary Beth said...

rhhardin said...

Chickens are dumber than democrats.

9/17/15, 9:07 AM


Citation needed.

Bob Boyd said...

“The spirits arrived, seizing a woman and a man....The woman, in a frenzy, screamed repeatedly, then grabbed a live chicken and bit its head off."

Bill doesn't say the man and woman weren't himself and Hillary. If it was, that would explain why Bill outsourced his blow jobs after that.

Dr.D said...

Disgusting!

Jim said...

"Bill doesn't say the man and woman weren't himself and Hillary. If it was, that would explain why Bill outsourced his blow jobs after that."

Bob Boyd gets my vote for thread winner with that one.

Grant said...

Well, that explains a lot.

Joe Biden, America's Putin said...

Not to worry. The Clinton Foundation big money has all but saved Haiti.

CWJ said...

Bob Boyd,

Wouldn't that make Hillary a geek?

JSD said...

Third world ignorance – Cultural beliefs to be celebrated
First world ignorance - Ridicule

Mexican witch doctors are called “Curandero”. Everybody knows they’re flim flam grafters going after your money. I’m sure it’s the same scam in Haiti.

Fernandinande said...

How quaint.

Charlie said...

Bill told the chicken to put some ice on it.

Ron Winkleheimer said...

I'm confused, wasn't Sarah Palin declared an ignorant snowbilly at least partially because some pastor from Africa prayed over her and asked God to protect her from witches and she didn't immediately denounce him and use the forum (a church) to advocate evolution and the availability of all books ever at the Wasilla library, regardless of the cost?

traditionalguy said...

So now we know how the Secret Server got wiped and left no clue.Hillary called in a favor from Doctor Voodu that watches over the couples he casts spells upon. Not that there is anything wrong with trading favors.

madAsHell said...

""Mr. Beauvoir was in his mid-30s and planning a career in biochemistry when his grandfather, on his deathbed, stunningly anointed him his successor as a houngan...""

Why is it always a life interrupted? How many times have we heard "He was a good boy, and planning on going to college."

What exactly is a career in biochemistry?

furious_a said...

Did you know that a chicken's head was bitten off in a Bill and Hillary Clinton honeymoon ceremony?!

I thought it was because Black Sabbath played the reception.

Ron Winkleheimer said...

It occurs to me, Hillary being a witch would go a long way towards explaining some of the outfits she wears. Does she avoid water?

David Begley said...

This explains much. The Clintons have had a voodoo curse on them from the beginning.

AllenS said...

Sometime in the 1980s, a Hmong man broke his arm where I worked. A couple of days later a Hmong Grand Poobah (I don't know what else to call him) and about a dozen other Hmong men showed up at work with a live chicken to slaughter at the exact place where the man broke his arm. Work said no.

Back when not being so tolerant was accepted.

Chickens get picked on, don't they?

JSD said...

God damn auto correct. It’s “grifter” not “grafter”. Too bad, because it’s one of those great old-time New York City/Irish slang words for a certain kind of thief. I would hate to see the word disappear.

Eric the Fruit Bat said...

Ooo eee, ooo ah ah, ting tang, walla walla bing bang.

Ooo eee, ooo ah ah, walla walla bing bang bing!

Char Char Binks, Esq. said...

See the sacrifice of the virgin women
See the deadly snake and the headless chicken
Take a sip from dripping red
Make it with the living dead

Take you up when you feeling down
When you're sick he will come around
Takes his cures from out the ground
He's the one who can hypnotize
And you'll never believe your eyes
He can cause the dead to rise

HoodlumDoodlum said...

But it's not like she put a dog on top of a car or anything barbaric like that, guys.

TrespassersW said...

How is it that people who are putatively Christians, who will claim to believe in the Father, Son, and Holy Ghost, don't seem to believe in the Father of Lies and his minions.

Freeman Hunt said...

Did you know that a chicken's head was bitten off in a Bill and Hillary Clinton honeymoon ceremony?!

No. I wonder if I'd have heard about it if a chicken's head were bitten off in a Mitt and Ann Romney honeymoon ceremony?

Mike (MJB Wolf) said...

Is that where she got her secret evil powers that came with the tragic prediction that they would wane before she could effectively consolidate world domination?

Be said...

Keep in mind: I'm a White Girl whose brother killed his wife and is doing Life, no parole. My Mom killed herself. I am Numb to all this. The first time I was ever Horrified was, when a former colleague lost her son in a gang shootout.

White Catholics and Black Ones from different churches have different means of Representing Grief. (Had a talk at the time, when shit came down, with the History Prof whose classes I was using to get through the // situations.)

"Bev, is Haitian Christianity actual Christianity?"

"Dr. Lodestone, I think so. Haiti Kato is Horrifying, but closer to you than Candoble.

Valentine Smith said...

Hey Stumpy Clinton, did that cock crow after Hill bit its head off?

I knew he had no balls, but I never imagined he was missing additional equipment.

No wonder he rapes women, he doesn't want anyone seeing what I assume is a strange looking stump. I hope for his sake he was packing major heat before that happened.

My name goes here. said...

" The woman, in a frenzy, screamed repeatedly, then grabbed a live chicken and bit its head off."

Foreshadowing.

SGT Ted said...

""Mr. Beauvoir was in his mid-30s and planning a career in biochemistry"

Riiiight. Sure you were, buddy.