October 18, 2014

The "sniff parlor."

In Tokyo.

21 comments:

traditionalguy said...

Doesn't the Professor have to recuse herself on this topic.

Bob Boyd said...

"Welcome to Pure Doll. How may I help you?"

"I want to smell a school girl."

"Of course. Do have a preference with respect to GPA?"

"Not really. I'm more of an extracurricular activities man."

"Drama? Sports?"

"Marching Band."

"An excellent choice, sir. Right this way."

Ann Althouse said...

"Doesn't the Professor have to recuse herself on this topic."

I would need a really extreme place... I mean I would need Meade to go to some extreme of uncleanliness to relate to me in the olfactory dimension.

Anonymous said...

They tried this in Germany, except the girls dressed up as Nazis and everything smelled like sauerkraut.

YoungHegelian said...

They had shut down the sniff parlor in Osaka because of poor customer service. The girls wouldn't slap the customers' face after the sniff!

What kind of sniff shop is it when the customer can't get a good slap across the face at the end? Back in my day, the girls would slap you & you didn't need to beg for it. These young girls, today, I tell ya!

(Another story to file under "Those Weird Japanese")

Anonymous said...

'Schoolgirl Body Spray'.

Currently comes in three scents: 'Catholic', 'Connecticut Prep School' and 'Lolita'.

The Gift Box comes with white knee-high socks.

Anonymous said...

All was going well at the Sniff Parlor until Harvey Keitel walked in.

madAsHell said...

Smells like Teen Spirit

Bob Boyd said...

"I'm terribly sorry, sir. I've been informed that our Marching Band is a seasonal offering. I'm afraid its simply unavailable just now."

"That's most disappointing. I've had a yen for something Marching Bandish all week."

"Might I suggest something in a similar vein?"

"What did you have in mind?"

"We have an excellent Pep Band year 'round. Very popular."

"Pep Band, eh?"

"Less kinetic, to be sure, but still full of the same energy and enthusiasm. Long practice sessions. Seated."

"I must say, you've intrigued me."

Unknown said...

The Forensic Speech girls smell the best. And can they conversate.

Wince said...

I for one would like to invite Crack to Sniff Pallor.

traditionalguy said...

There is a lingering memory of bubblegum and sweaty cheerleader that never goes away. But she did go away, somewhere my love.

Anonymous said...

In The Vagina as Fascist State the life-choice of rejecting procreation and 'common' sexuality has effected biological changes in the female: nowhere is this more noticeable than in the smell of women's bicycle seats.

In the pre-The Vagina as Fascist State era a woman's bicycle seat smelt of health and promise, with a hint of Pineapple Life-Saver candy. Now the modern feminist's bicycle seat is strangely arid, with but the tinge of a desiccated teriyaki jerky-like scent and the occasional perfumed ointments used to soothe recently-shaved pubic areas and/or STD sores.

In The Vagina as Fascist State the previously harmless act of sniffing a bicycle seat now has connotations of deviancy and possible stalking behavior: soon, a women will no doubt need to give her verbal consent to having her bicycle seat sniffed.

The men who accept The Vagina as Fascist State pretend this never even enters their mind: no, they walk past dozens of women's bicycle seats at, say, the park, and there is no biological compulsion to smell even one -- or so they say. The men who have rejected The Vagina as Fascist State know otherwise: those 'men' are only fooling themselves. Well: themselves, and the women of The Vagina as Fascist State that they prostrate themselves before.

Anonymous said...

Musical proof that the Pre-Vagina as Fascist State Seventies were a more fragrant era..

William said...

The Japanese are to perversions what the Milanese are to fashions. This is a new, cutting edge perversion that many here will mock. Well, they said the same thing about bukkake, and now it's an accepted part of the courtship ritual.

Anonymous said...

I don't think Alabama Hot Pockets have caught on in Japan. Yet.

Peter

James Pawlak said...

Well, it should be not more than a month before one opens on Madison' State Street OR Milwaukee's "Rainbow Flag District".

Anonymous said...

Also: a recently bleached anus changes the smell of a bicycle seat dramatically. So I've heard.

Anonymous said...

The worst bicycle seat has to be that of the rent-a-bike: it is like a hundred voices all talking in your head. Rule of thumb when hearing voices in your head: the loudest voice is the one you least want to hear.

Anonymous said...

Interestingly, the scent of a bicycle seat can give intuition to the presence of Thigh Gap.

Anonymous said...

Given the choice, it is better to smell the bicycle seats of women who have ridden uphill rather than women who have ridden downhill. Provided proper hygiene etc etc.