September 24, 2013

"When you desire to make any one 'love' you with whom you meet... you can very readily reach him..."

Says The Ladies' Book of Useful Information (1896):
Wherever or whenever you meet again, at the first opportunity grasp his hand in an earnest, sincere, and affectionate manner, observing at the same time the following important directions, viz.: As you take his bare hand in yours, press your thumb gently, though firmly, between the bones of the thumb and the forefinger of his hand, and at the very instant when you press thus on the blood vessels (which you can before ascertain to pulsate) look him earnestly and lovingly in the eyes, and send all your heart's, mind's, and soul's strength into his organization, and he will be your friend...
His organization, eh?

I was all about to find Meade and try that move, but I got distracted by "organization" and had to check out the (unlinkable) Oxford English Dictionary. Here are a couple quotes therefrom to help you grasp "organization" (until it pulsates):
1860 Dickens Uncommerc. Traveller in All Year Round 24 Mar. 513/1, I must stuff into my delicate organisation, a currant pincushion which I know will swell into immeasurable dimensions when it has got there.

1908 G. K. Chesterton Man who was Thursday 39 You, my poor fellow, are an anarchist deprived of the help of that law and organization which is so essential to anarchy.

11 comments:

Meade said...

100 years later, all she need do is flash thong.

YoungHegelian said...

The passage you quote is so detailed (e.g. "press your thumb gently ... between the bones of the thumb and the forefinger...and ... press thus on the blood vessels...") that there must be some now lost theory of human physiology that underlies it.

What that theory might be I have no idea.

Wince said...

Fair Game

The ones you never notice are the ones you have to watch.
She's pleasant and she's friendly while she's looking at your crotch.
Try your hand at conversation, gossip is a lie,
And sure enough she'll take you home and make you wanna die.

And you're fair game,
You'll never know what she'll decide, you're fair game,
Just relax, enjoy the ride.

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

Do you moisturize?

Anonymous said...

Organization.... It's a good thing.

Martha Stewart



Lem the artificially intelligent said...

there must be some now lost theory of human physiology that underlies it.

It's from another long lost Muslim hadith, recaptured from Saddam's hands by Bush the father.

gerry said...

Love, Afghan Style.

traditionalguy said...

Maybe hand massage works as a reflexology works on the feet and toes in connecting pressure points to internal organs.

The Beetles earliest hit was about wanting to hold a hand: Oh yeah I'll tell you something I think you'll understand...I want to hold your hand.

Austin said...

The "Beetles"!?! I do hope and pray that was a typo! Also, " I Want To Hold Your Hand" was by no means their earliest hit.

Rocketeer said...

So, yeah, I've read that Dickens passage several times now and I'm trying to decide gien limited context whether "pincushion" refers to that thing you put pins in, or to a pincushion flower (currant colored, of course) that will grow well when it arrives at it's destination and is planted.

Beach Brutus said...

You take a pulse with your index and forefinger. If you try to take it with your thumb you will not detect the other person's pulse but that in your own thumb.